Ooh aah, Eric Cantona

Can't say I've ever got excited about a men's deodorant advertisement before but mid-life is one long, rocky dirt track of surprises. The current French team may have dramatically exited the World Cup but former player/poet turned actor, Eric Cantona, 44, has teamed up with L'Oréal Paris to launch a brand spanking new range of deodorants. England can keep their mascot, David Beckham and his M&S suit. That's Not My Age is more than happy with Monsieur Cantona and his sweet smelling armpits. Cantona is 'a man who understands the importance of keeping cool under extreme pressure.' A man who 'wants to take control of his life.' A man who may need the money from an anti-perspirant ad (?) And, in what is probably not his best poem ever, the football legend says:



Ooh, er!

So, in preparation for our holiday in France next week, I've very kindly bought Monsieur That's Not My Age a summer gift. No, not another pair of harem pants, some 48-hour anti-perspirant with NEW sweat captor technology so that he can smell fresh, intensely woody and just like Eric. Ooh la la!











Are you in complete control of your body, your sensations?

Why I love Paris

There are two reasons That's Not My Age wants to visit Paris at the moment - and neither of them include the words fashion and week. No. I want to go to Paris to see Eric Cantona, 43, making his stage debut, followed by a spot of nightclubbing at Queen, where Mamy Rock, a 69 year-old DJ is er, rocking la maison.

If we're talking heroes, then Monsieur Cantona is mine. That's Not My Age saw the French footballer play many times for Manchester United, and can confirm that he's worthy of the title, Eric the King. So regal. And now I'm past caring about live football and couldn't afford it anyway, monsieur is the star of stage and screen. How thoughtful. Last year, Mr TNMA bought tickets to see a special screening of Ken Loach's Looking for Eric, followed by a Q&A session with Cantona and Loach. Now, I may be a little bit biased, but the film, a heart-warming tale of love, loss and legends, was brilliant. When Cantona walked into the cinema afterwards, there was a collective gasp, quickly followed by a standing ovation - and a few tears! Even Mr TNMA (a Chelsea fan) got a bit emotional. I was desperate to ask Monsieur C a question, but 'Will you go out with me?' didn't feel appropriate. So, even though I won't be able to keep up with the French dialogue, I'd still like to see my hero perform in Face au Paradis. Oh yes, whether it's on screen, stage or soccer pitch, I love to spend 90 minutes with Eric Cantona.

And then when I've recovered my composure, it'll be off to see Mamy Rock. The superstar DJ who's hot news in Paris. " I like to mix old and new,' says Ruth Flowers (real name) from Bristol, 'so I might put electro alongside the Rolling Stones.' The glamorous grandma started clubbing after her husband died, and may be the oldest DJ in town but in super-sized sunglasses, metallic bomber jacket and tracksuit bottoms, she rocks.



Face au Paradis is on at Théatre Mariguy, Paris.



Photos

Eric Cantona from The Mirror
Mamy Rock from The Guardian